Monday, October 3, 2011

Bieber Poster

Today, because I'm tired and a little bit sick AGAIN (thanks Arizona weather), I'm gonna keep this quick. Take a gander, if you will, at the following picture.

I took this picture as I was passing a part supply store in Goodyear. Looking back, maybe it's weird that I took a picture of a Justin Bieber poster, but I promise - there's a good reason. 

I didn't know what this poster is supposed to be advertising, or promoting - but I've come out with a few possibilities. 

1. This is a party for Justin Bieber and he is a VIP. The language really is very confusing. Based simply on the English language, that's what this poster means - but I don't think that JB needs to outsource his party posters to "Party City" in Goodyear. I'm sure he has people for that. Also, if JB had his own party (which is exactly what a Justin Bieber VIP Party would seem to be) wouldn't he probably already be a host? I mean - it's HIS party.

2. This is a Justin Bieber themed party. I understand that this is most likely what this poster is referring to. I'm not even gonna touch on how absurd a Justin Bieber party is, and instead skip right ahead to the part that says - "VIP Party". Is the whole party a VIP party? If that's the case, then it kinda ruins the whole point of having a VIP if everyone at the party is one. OR, even worse, is this poster placed somewhere in a bigger JB themed party, and only the cooler 10 year old kids are allowed in this section? "Sorry Sally, you're not allowed in the VIP Party. You didn't share your gel pens with Kate last week. You're not on the list."

3. This is just a regular party poster, but they're letting Justin Bieber know that if he shows, he'll be a VIP. I would think this goes without saying. Doesn't he have three platinum tracks and a grammy or two? OBVIOUSLY he's going to be a VIP. Maybe the hosts of the party just hang this up in case JB rolls by and wants to get down. In which case he'll know that he'll get a warm reception at this particular shindig. I'm sure this works, I hear JB hangs out in the Goodyear area A LOT.

4. It's a warning against the growing occult of popular culture in our society. And by making JB huge, and having ships and airplanes appear to be tiny in comparison, the makers of this poster are saying that we are promoting a culture in which we are creating false idols. And instead of light hearted poster about a 10 year old's birthday party. In reality this is a cautionary, propaganda poster warning about the demise of our culture at the feet of these false gods. And by exalting these false gods, and thereby breaking the Third Commandment brought forth by Moses, we have created a reality in which pianos are no longer linear or small, but instead are monstrous and wrap around the sea and the sky in a way that breaks the laws of physics and creation. 

I'll concede that number 4 is a stretch. But I still think this poster is stupid. Drew Rynienwicz made "Baby" a way better song anyway. 

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